AND THEY'RE OFF!

E got his braces off today! Just in time for the next child to get his on.  A word of advice to parents of young children.  Forget about saving for college.  Start saving for braces!

His teeth do look lovely.  Seriously, that is one handsome kid!  But I still can't figure out why a bit of metal, a few wires, and a handful of rubber bands costs so darn much.  Being the natural beauty that I am, I never needed braces, so perhaps I can't appreciate the process.  But I bet E thinks the whole experience was overpriced too.  

According to my dad, back in the day they used to put your braces on with a soldering iron and remove them with a hammer and chisel.  I suspect that may be an exaggeration along the lines of walking up hill to school, both ways, in the snow.  But maybe that's what we're paying so much for.  Modern day dental technology.

Honestly, I rather admire the British approach to dental care.  Just think, if we all stopped putting braces on our children, crooked, gapped-tooth smiles would become socially acceptable.

We'd all be perfectly happy, and we'd save ourselves thousands of dollars over the course of raising our families.  Possibly millions, if your family is large. 

I'm married to a Canadian.  Their take on dental health is similar to the British approach.  Do nothing.  If a tooth bothers you so much you can't stand it, pull it out.  Tell people you lost it playing hockey.

My husband comes from a family of seven children.  As far as I know, not one of them ever had braces.  His parents used the money they saved on braces to put a down payment on a house.  Just kidding!  About the down payment, not about the lack of braces.  But they could have used the money they saved to put a down payment on a house.  And that's my point.

So today I call upon my fellow Americans to stop the ridiculous, money wasting practice of straightening our children's teeth.  Just think, we could breathe new life into the weak housing market and jump start the economy with all the money we'll have to spend on other things.   

I know, easy for me to say, now that my son's teeth are all straight and pretty.

But I assure you, I'm perfectly willing to let the other two go through life with crooked, gap-toothed grins.  Well, maybe......that is an awfully nice smile.

FINALLY!

C's due date was September 20th.  The first thing I said to the doctor when I heard that was, "What? That's 5 days after the deadline to start school!"  When I went into labor 10 days early, the first thing I said to my husband was "Hooray! He can start school a whole year earlier!"

And he did.  Just a mere five days before the deadline.  Believe me, I heard from plenty of people how that was a big mistake.  Especially since, you know, he was a boy.  The trend is definitely to wait, even if your child turns 5 well before the cut-off. 

Which is a-okay, if that's what is best for your child.  And as excited as I was to get that last one out the door and off to school, I would have waited if that was the right thing for him. As it is, he's at the top of his grade in math and reading, despite being the youngest. I think he would have been bored silly if I kept him home for another year. I don't mean to brag (well, maybe I do a little bit), I'm just sayin' that academically speaking, he's done all right.

What I did not expect was the emotional and psychological trauma my child would experience by being the last child in his entire grade to lose a tooth!  I don't even know if he really is the last child to lose a tooth.  But when your friends have been showing up with missing teeth since day one of kindergarten, and you're practically half-way through the second grade, it sure feels like it.  And that's what you tell your parents. Every. Single. Day. For. Two. Whole. Years.

But finally, on Sunday morning, he caught up with the rest of his classmates.  Hallelujah!  His dad pulled the tooth out in the bathroom at church.  For safe-keeping, he put it in one of the envelopes we use to pay our tithes and offerings.  Which worked out well, seeing as we came home with the tooth and gave the envelope with the offerings to the bishop.  Because that would have been awkward, trying to explain to the bishop why we'd donated a tooth, and trying to explain to a 7 year-old that the tooth fairy didn't mean to leave him that much money.

But all is well in the life of this very happy, and very mature, second grader.  Now, let's hope it's those silver teeth that start falling out next.....

TURNING FORTY: THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY

This is me, back in the good old days, when I was 38.  I'll be 40 soon.  I don't look a day older than I did in this picture, but you're just going to have to take my word for that.  And please, I appreciate the gesture, but you don't need to leave comments about how I could pass for a college student.

What's good about turning 40?  For starters, my husband surprised me with a trip to San Francisco to see my college roommate! That's not just good....it's great!  I'm heading out tomorrow! Perhaps now would be a good time to mention that I have another college roommate who lives in England.  In case anyone needs ideas for future birthdays.

I won't have to make dinner on my birthday.  I love food, but food made by someone else is especially tasty. 

One good thing about getting older is that you care less and less about what people think.  Do you have an opinion about how I dress, or do my hair?  Or how I raise my kids.  Do you like my cooking?  Or my home decor?  Well, I just don't care.  Perhaps a nicer way of putting it would be that the older I get, the more comfortable I am being who I am. 

I've been wondering about these milestone birthdays.  Why, exactly, are years like 40 and 50 considered milestones?  I mean, I'm only going to be one year older.  Big whoop!

I've come to the conclusion that the milestone birthdays are those in which we must add more invasive, annual medical tests to our list of things to do.  That's pretty much the only difference between 39 and 40.  When you're 39, you don't have to get a mammogram.  When you're 40, you do.

Which of course makes you feel old, even if you're perfectly healthy.  Because being tested for something means that the medical experts think you are old and worn out enough to possibly have it.  That won't bother me though.  I already feel old.  I have ever since I realized that the pharmacist knows my name and birth date.  Which means I'm closer to her than some of my own family members. 

So, there it is in a nutshell.  The pros and cons of turning 40.

Good

Trip to San Francisco

Not making dinner

Not caring what people think

Bad

Additional invasive medical testing